As a child, my mother always made me and my sister attend church which bored me to death. As for myself, I never got anything but sleepy from the messages preached to us from some stranger behind a pulpit. Then one day my mother sat me and my sister down in the living room while she proceeded to share with us the greatest love story I've ever heard. The reason I was actually hearing it for the very first time was probably due to knowing it was shared with me from someone I knew who loved me and it wasn't for the purpose of another name in a church roll book or dollar in a collection plate. My mom proceeded to open the Word of God (the Bible) and share with us John 3:16 "For God so Loved the world that He gave us His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” My mother then interjected that He sent His son for me! I was bowled over with that knowledge but then wondered to myself but why did He have to die for me. It was as if my mom was reading my mind for then she shared with me Romans 3:23 which states “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;" and Romans 6:23 which states "For the wages of sin is death; but the free gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." Needless to say I could hardly wait to confess to Him my sins as John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. " and to invite Him into my heart to rule and reign from that day forward as Revelation 3:20 states "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." Since that day when I was nine years old, I have never regretted surrendering to His Love and Lordship of all of my life. That is not to say I haven't had my share of trials these last fifty years. As a teenager I was memorizing scripture as others dated throughout their teenage years. I married as a virgin myself and loved and served Christ throughout my married life as well. Then after 11 years of marriage to the one I would have easily laid my life down for if I had to, found that she no longer desired me as her husband. This resulted in me experiencing one of the greatest agonies I think any person can go through and still function as a living human being. That is a story in itself and would be glad to elaborate if you're in a similar situation and would like additional information about that chapter of my life. I honestly felt like I could never love again and God showed me that he knew how to bring life out of the ashes and breathe life back into dead and dried out bones by bringing someone into my life who also was torn and rent in two by her spouse that chose cocaine and prostitutes over her and his family and thus destroyed her and his children both emotionally and financially before that marriage also was terminated. Yes, knowing Him personally doesn’t result in living a rose garden experience but it does mean having peace that passes all understanding when your heart hurts so bad you wish you were dead. It means you have a living loving Lord who has experienced every pain that we will ever go through (yes even the pain of a tearing heart, for it wasn’t the nails and the physical torture that caused Him to cry out in anguish from the cross “my God, my God why hast Thou forsaken me?”, it was the pain of the Father having to look away that one moment when He took the sins of the whole world upon Himself for the Father could not look on sin). To know the blessings of Trust and Obedience over feelings and disobedience is the only way to live a victorious Christian life. Anybody can sing and shout when all is going well, but to do so during heart wrenching trials is to offer up the sacrifice of thanksgiving that gives Great Glory to God and shames satan. If you would like to know more or if I may be of further assistance to you, please email me (address is below). Thank you
The following link is one written for purposes of documenting the trials and tribulations that alcohol can cause within families and also just an accounting for my children and their children.
The following link is one written to my birth Dad who left myself and Mom when I was about 6 years old who was recently diagnosed with cancer in both kidneys.